Faithful

I just need to praise God!

He continues to remind me every single day of His undying faithfulness to me and that He has been in every step along the way.  This week has just been full of reminder after reminder of how much He loves me and that He has plans for me far beyond what I could ever imagine.

I had the opportunity to help someone I don't even know out financially last week, and in doing so, took a rather dramatic leap of faith that God would provide.  The next day, I was offered a job for next year that will more than cover my expenses.  The next week I was given a scholarship that I didn't even know existed.  God is providing in AMAZING ways!!! AND, two of my best friends are now fully funded for their missions trips this summer.  My roommate had someone walk up to her and offer to pay for the entire trip!  Who can say that these two people have not been called by God to these countries when He has SO dramatically provided????? If you haven't read Isaiah 41:9-10 recently, you should get on that.

Even more dramatic: my God is a God of reconciliation and restoration.  If you read my last post, you know that a dear friend has been on my mind a lot recently, and that my heart has been broken about the rift between us.  Today, I talked to that friend for the first time since September and had the opportunity to ask forgiveness.  I've been praying for reconciliation with that person for the last 7 months, and God orchestrated it in ways that I never could have.  I love Him for His goodness to me and for the way He speaks to my heart and I need everyone to know that.


Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol Him, all you peoples.  For great is His love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever.  Praise the Lord.  Psalm 117:1-2

Dear Friend,

The letter that I will never send, but will always want to send.

 

Dear friend,

            I saw you walking by today with a broken look on your face and my arms physically ached to hold you and let you know that everything will be alright.  I would have given everything to be able to text you and ask about your day.  Do you know what it is to love someone so much that you would give your very life for them but not be able to tell them?

            What happened to us?  I know that I made that final call, but I want you to know that it was the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do.  I cried for months afterward and I still wonder every day if I made the right decision.  I’m terrified that what I did with the best intentions only served to push you closer to the edge and I will regret the decision that I had to make for the rest of my life.

            You were my brother and my best friend and I loved you more than I can say.  A year later I still get the urge to text you, and when my heart was hurt all I wanted was a hug that told me you still cared and that the boy was wrong.  I miss the way we laughed and the way you defended me.  Some days I would give everything for another walk to the beach.

            Despite all of this doubt and these feelings, I’ve given you to the One who loves you more than I ever could.  I give you to the One who is more than able to bridge this chasm now between us and to heal what has been broken.  In the end, I followed Him in the only way I knew how, and I pray with my whole heart that He grabs your heart once more and reminds you of His love.  I can’t bear the thought of you going through this life without knowing a relationship with your Father, and the thought of spending eternity without you makes it hard to breathe.   

I’ll love you, brother, until the day I die, and I won’t stop praying for you until then.  

Love always,
   Chelsie